WHEN YOU LOSE IT ALL...there is a certain freedom in knowing you are as low as you can go...rock bottom is no longer a mystical place, "under the bridge" no longer an hypothesis...you are there, and you're OK, and guess what...it only CAN get better!
WHEN A MAN HITS THE SKIDS...one of two things will occur 1) he slithers away into the night, and hurries the suicidal events and the shitty thinking involved, dumber & drunker...faster & faster, making themselves less & less worth of mercy OR . . .
2) he receives his suffering like a man, asks God to help him, and endeavors to help those around him...while embracing his "Jailhouse Salvation" and the "blessed lessons".......to follow....simple as that...either they get their karmic shit together....or they die on the streets...
2) he receives his suffering like a man, asks God to help him, and endeavors to help those around him...while embracing his "Jailhouse Salvation" and the "blessed lessons".......to follow....simple as that...either they get their karmic shit together....or they die on the streets...
MY STRUGGLE WAS only beginning, and for a poet of the spiritual metaphysical supernatural variety, I felt cut a little deeper than most, when only a few months ago...1997, I was the toast of Bondi Beach, the man who elevated Keith Urban to "the next Big Thing" teaching him everything he knows and all....my, my, my....things were not even REMOTELY going the way I'd planned...I mean, where was all the money, friends, and recognition for all my cosmic vibrational phenomenal achievements? Why was I here? How did this happen? What was taking so long with the girl at the meds counter? ....why am I drooling so much, and where the FUCK is my other flip flop??...
SOON THE JUDGE would give me the "A-OK" to return to society via the vultures in the "half-way house" game...where the rubber mattresses and adorable freshly paroled smoke bumming muttonheads soon drove me to escape...during a fake dental appointment, tasting ONCE MORE the shitty, stupid Nashville rainy mindset, I'd fought so hard to avoid....
SOON I WOULD LEARN ABOUT REHAB, half way horror houses & the low lifes that run them...Alcoholics Unanimous, and the role Methadone clinics play in our society..the entire lifestyle of the joyfully addicted....the old saying is...when you shake heroin, you shed a monkey from your back...when you go methadone you get a gorilla up there......
My love affair with the drug would span off & on for 15 years....throw in the mental wards, Jails, crack-houses, half-way houses, whorehouses, safe-houses and....hey!..wait a minute...
you're thinking this would make a good movie are'nt you?
from the bestselling new book by Vernon Rust FAKE NEWS (on Amazon)
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